The idea of anal sex is erotic and exciting for many people, especially since it is also so taboo. Many women and men fantasize about anal sex but are reluctant to actually try it because they are worried about whether it will hurt or feel uncomfortable. Although any concerns are perfectly normal, it is possible for women to enjoy anal sex-in fact, many women love it!

Trying Anal

The anus contains sensitive nerve endings, so anal intercourse can be quite pleasurable for both partners. The secret to enjoying anal sex is to relax, communicate and follow a few helpful hints:

• Start clean: Before you and your partner get dirty together, get clean together in the shower. Lather up and rinse well before initiating anal sex so that cleanliness issues don't interfere with your erotic encounter.


• Get her going: Your partner will enjoy anal sex a great deal more if you bring her to a high state of arousal first. Focus on other parts of her body until she aroused enough for anal play. Using nipple toys and/or a vibrator can be a fun way to begin some naughty play. Also, many couples enjoy using spanking toys together, especially before anal sex. Only transition to anal intercourse when she is extremely aroused.


• Go slow: When you and your partner are both ready to move on to anal stimulation, begin by caressing your partner's buttocks and stimulating the outside of her anus with a gentle finger or a vibrating anal toy. Once she is feeling relaxed and aroused, slowly insert the toy or your finger, allowing the anal sphincter to accommodate it before moving deeper and moving it in a slow, shallow, circular motion.


• Lube up: Unlike the vagina, the anus doesn't produce any natural lubrication, so you'll need to use plenty of anal lube to avoid tearing or bleeding. You might also try a desensitizing lube, especially if you are new to anal sex or if your partner is especially sensitive.


• Go even slower: When you and your partner are both ready to move on to anal sex, make sure the receiving partner sets the pace - and the depth. Enter very slowly, and be gentle. The receiving partner should concentrate on relaxing her anus until your penis is fully inserted. Wait for her to accommodate you before you begin thrusting, and only use slow, gentle motions until she changes the pace.



• Pay attention: It's easy to get caught up in what you're doing together, so don't neglect the rest of her body! She will need you to continue stimulating her breasts, clit and other erogenous zones. You might also try using a clit teaser during anal sex - the combination of clitoral and anal play can be very powerful.

Health & Safety Concerns

Anal sex is perfectly healthy and safe. However, the anus contains bacteria that are unhealthy for the vagina, so if you and your partner interchange vaginal and anal intercourse, always use a condom and change it before you move from anal to vaginal sex. If you are worried about fecal matter, an enema or anal douche before and/or after anal sex will alleviate your concerns.
Finally, always remember the most important rule about any kind of anal play: only insert objects with a flared base so that toys don't become lost in your rectum or bowels. Only use toys that were designed for anal play.

by Tamar Love